i've had her, she's nothing

So. Tonight.

I spent an hour or two memorizing a few songs at home, then busted out to busk at the good ole 23rd Street Station. There were a few Phil Ochs songs in attendance, as well as some fragments of my own that are in progress, and I was really pleased by how well-received they were. I made a couple bones, always a good thing given that my college loans are a little past due. But aside from the obvious boon of a roll of singles, it was really great to see people enjoying the music. Some poorly misguided by very kind lady told me my voice was "angelic." A cluster of women who I presume were tourists videotaped me from across the platform on the downtown side. And there were the usual nods of recognition when I played a Dylan or Neil Young song that someone approved of. I'd forgotten how nice it feels to do this.

I wasn't feeling the harmonica much tonight, so in place of it, I guess I ended up scatting. Not sure what else to call it. There's some scat-stuff in "Hands & Knees" anyhow, and I guess I've been going more and more in that direction. There are just some vowels sounds I'm obsessed with, I've realized. I couldn't probably explain it, but there are sounds that I'm big on, pet sounds, and whereas most people might cite clarinet licks or backwards-recorded guitars as pet sounds (not that I don't), I've become increasingly obsessed with the shapes of these vowels, and with letting loose on them, abandoning words. I think these particular vowel sounds are prevalent in folk music, too, which is maybe where this comes from.

Still working on my new song. There are of course several now, as I can't ever pin down one version of what I'm feeling, so inevitably it family trees outward into too many bits that risk incompletion. I think I'm gonna have at least one pretty nice one in a few days.

In the meanwhile, here's a great Phil Ochs song. The last stanza's chilling.


The night air is inviting you to walk out on the trail
You will not fail,
You will not fail
And by the beach, a lady sails a ship without a sail
And you reach out for her,
And you reach out for her
But, I've had her,
I've had her
She's nothing

Down the cliffs you clamber and you tumble to the shore
The warm waves roar,
The warm waves roar
And on the reef a mermaid siren screams, "one perfume more"
And she shouts to you,
Through the foam, she shouts to you
But, I've had her,
I've had her
She's nothing

The players at the party are prepared to take a chance
They drop their pants,
They drop their pants
In the corner, she's so crystaline no one dares to ask a dance
And she calls out to you,
And she calls out to you
But, I've had her,
I've had her
She's nothing

In the prison of your broken bed, you dribble in a dream
And find a queen,
And find a queen
But your sleep is sadly stolen by the face that is a stream
That's flowing out to you,
She's flowing out to you
But, I've had her,
I've had her
She's nothing

The vision of the seven veils are racing down the road
Signs are slow,
The signs are slow
But beauty is the mistress and the beauty you've been told
You'd speed the route for her,
You'd speed the route for her
But, I've had her,
I've had her
She's nothing

The fog has changed the city to a friendly frightened fawn
The shades are drawn,
The shades are drawn
To posess her misty madness, you would gladly duel the dawn
And fade out to her,
And fade out to her
But, I've had her,
I've had her
She's nothing

The circus clown, he hides a tear beneath his pained smile
And charms a child,
And charms a child
While the dancing girls and prancing horse blows kisses down the aisle
You'd roll about for her,
You'd roll about for her
But, I've had her,
I've had her
She's nothing

All alone, the flaming field, your fairy love is spread
Your time has fled,
Your time has fled
Now the only way to touch her is the gun beside your head
Now there's now doubt for her,
Now there's now doubt for her
But, I've had her
I've had her
She's nothing